Tuesday, January 21, 2014

A Few Thoughts On Friendship

“I think if I've learned anything about friendship, it's to hang in, stay connected, fight for them, and let them fight for you. Don't walk away, don't be distracted, don't be too busy or tired, don't take them for granted. Friends are part of the glue that holds life and faith together. Powerful stuff.”  ~ Jon Katz

Last March, at my stepdad's funeral, my long time best friend, someone whose history is intertwined with my own,  said to me, "I miss you and our friendship." After a lifetime of friendship, we went through a breakup that wasn't the fault of anyone. We grew, changed and then our stories diverged. 

The past several months, those years we weren't part of each others lives have almost been forgotten. There  have been almost weekly dinners, shopping trips, movie and wine nights, and other shenanigans. But more than that, she's there....when I need to vent, to celebrate, and to cry. 

My other friends are scattered all across the country but they are still there for the ups and downs of life.  We laugh and cry together. 

Being there. Showing up. Whether face to face or virtually. Thats what friendship is about. I'm incredibly lucky to be a part of an amazing group of women, most of whom I met through blogging.  As part of one of my new year intentions to be better friend, I'm reminding myself of the quote above -- stay connected, fight for them, don't be distracted. Friends are part of the glue that holds life and faith together. 

My friends are the ones who keep me on task, remind me who I am when I've forgotten, challenge me to be better and better. Life easily gets in the way, especially when maintaining long distance friendships. I'm striving to be better. It takes time  and effort to keep the stories intertwined. 

I spent some time with another friend I met through blogging this weekend and it was a perfect start to the weekend -- catching up in a bookstore cafe, browsing through makeup, lunch with another friend and her daughter, more shopping, lots of talking. It was restorative and relaxing. 

Friends are what get us through life. The near friends. The far friends. The long time friends. The newer friends.  Hold tight to them. 


Kelly (She Wears a Red Sox Cap) said...

Such a lovely post and a good reminder especially at a time in my life that it would be easy to be distracted. It's great that you reunited with an old best friend this year. This happened to me once several years ago and this is still one of my closest friends now :)

Becky said...

Friends are what get us through life. The near friends. The far friends. The long time friends. The newer friends. Hold tight to them.


Nilsa @ SoMi Speaks said...

This is a great post, Mandy. The thing about friends is they are a choice. We choose our friends. They choose us. At any time, we can reverse that choice. (Unlike family, which is chosen for us.) That's an incredibly powerful opportunity (the power of choice). But, it also means, we cannot ignore or take for granted those friendships. We must nurture them. There will always be ebbs and flows to friendships, but the best ones are worth that extra effort, even when you don't think you have an ounce of extra energy to give.

Amber said...

Nilsa put it so perfectly. How wonderful we have the power to choose our friends but it's so so important we don't take our friendships for granted and we must nurture them. I admit I've found it really hard to nurture friendships, especially long distance ones, over the last couple of years but that's no ones fault but my own. Good reminders in this post and beautifully written as always!

Jen said...

That is perfect

Anonymous said...

It was so so so nice to catch up with you, and I can't wait to do it again soon! Love you!!