Shortly after the new year, I found myself in church. While its not a place I usually seek out, it was important for me to be there. I sat in the pew, watching as my dear friend and mentor addressed her congregation for the last time. In her sermon, she spoke about chasing stars, how she had found a passing star that she felt she needed to chase down and ride for a while. This star was going to take her away from her church but she owed it to herself to follow where it led. I sat there watching my friend who I knew had been struggling with not only this decision but others in her life as well. Even though we have a generation separating us, our lives seem to have a very similar parallel these days. I listened with tears brimming in my eyes as she so eloquently summed up her feelings.
Occasionally I feel as if I am standing on a high hill, all these stars swirling around me; watching as others take a leap, tie themselves to a star, and soar off into the night sky to see where it might take them. A few weeks ago a passing star shot past me, without a moment of hesitation I instinctively reached up and latched on. At first, it was euphoric. My heart accelerated as I wildly realized all the possibilities that could be, where this particular star might take me, and how it could change so much. The ride was exhilarating. Grasping on to that star took me quickly hurtling though the sky, an emotional journey if there ever was one. I was terrified more than once but knew that I needed to keep holding on. After a few days though, I began to feel that it wasn't my star but I couldn't quite let go. This morning without any sort of fanfare, as quickly as I had reached out, the star deposited me safely back where I started, forging ahead to find its rightful owner.
I thought I would feel differently than I do, realizing that the star I had been riding wasn't my own. I thought I would feel disappointed, weary but I'm not. Riding that star for a little while changed my perspective. It lifted me upward so I could see above my own situation, above the fog I before couldn't see through, giving me a clearer vision. While riding that star I saw other stars; ones better suited for me, going in the direction I wanted to go. Now I better realize what my star is going to look like. Riding the wrong star left me feeling more energized than I have been in weeks, knowing that some where in the big wide sky is the exact star that's meant just for me.
I'm more ready than ever, patiently keeping my eyes cast upward, waiting for the precise moment my star flies by so I can reach out and grasp it with both hands. Once I'm hitched to the right star, I know without a doubt that ride will be spectacular.