So the other night after work I am sitting in traffic, having sat through the same red light three times. Normally this would have me a tad bit salty, but it was a nice fall evening, I had windows down, the radio up...life was good. When you're sitting in traffic like that there isnt a whole lot to do so I people watched. The guy in the Audi to the left of me was having an animated cell phone conversation. The lady in the crossover behind me reinforcing her hair helmet armed with her aerosol can of hair spray. A teenager kid in a beat up pick up truck pounding out a musical beat on his steering wheel. "The Devil Went Down to Georgia" came on the radio, forcing me to bust out the air fiddle. Yes. I played the air fiddle. In my car. While stuck in traffic. Don't judge me.
Traffic finally started to move, I made it to the light, it was green so I went. Now I am pretty sure that green means go so imagine my surprise when a candy apple red Mustang ran the red light. The driver? A young bleached hair, tie dyed shirt wearing young girl waving her perfectly french manicured middle finger at me while yelling obscenities. (Um, hi, YOU ran the red light.) Now I get mad. Not only did she come ttthhhiiisss close to hitting me but she also ruined a perfectly good air fiddle routine. I interrupted my air fiddle playing to honk the horn, yell a few choice words back. I did however, let her drive past because I like my car in its usual undented state. We proceed at a snails pace down the road. As far as I am concerned the incident is over (well except my disappointment that I have at this point missed the end of the song). There was no metal on metal, no one was hurt, sure she had left some of her tire tread on the road but thats really not my problem. Well apparently, Tie Dyed Barbie in front of me had a different idea, she continued to flip me the bird and scream out of her window at me. I turned the radio up and ignored her. Then I noticed her license plate, its a familiar one the first three letters of a name and an 09 which I assumed signified a graduation year. Its a plate that I recognized and typically see a few blocks from my house. Struck by a moment of sheer genius, I proceeded to pull out my cell and make a few phone calls. Finally traffic evens out and Tie Dyed Barbie is off like a shot.
Within a few minutes of being home thanks to some
As my dog and I walk past Dear Old Dad says hi, what a pretty dog I have, and asks how my evening is going. Perfect opportunity to tell Dear Old Dad about a completely belligerent, ignorant driver who nearly took out the front end of my car then had the audacity to continue ranting and raving the entire time we were in traffic. I mention it was a car I recognized as belonging to someone on the block as I've noticed it around, maybe it was neighbor of his. The look on his face when I told him it was a red mustang was good. The look on his face when I told him what the vanity plate said was even better. Dear Old Dad apologized up one side and down the other for his little Tie Dyed Barbie who I would later learn was his stepdaughter. He wanted to know all the details, what she was yelling, etc. (I may or may not have added a few things.)
The icing on the cake? When Tie Dyed Barbie herself came out to tell him she was going out
Moral of the story? I don't get mad, I get even. (Oh, and really, please don't interrupt my air fiddling!)
21 comments:
hahahaha i'm proud of you mandy!
chalk this up to another perk of living in a small town. you can track anyone down!
That is the BEST story EVER!!!! I LOVE it. She obviously learned that you can't act like that in a small town - you have to wait until you are somewhere were no one will know you. :)
What a rude little biotch! I love that you did that!
That.is.AWESOME! I would've totally done the SAME THING! mwhahahaha
hahah that is awesome, Mandy!
nice. poor poor Tie Dyed Barbie.
I hate stupid drivers.
I play a pretty mean drum on my steering wheel. i would be pretty ticked as well if it were cut short.
i should re-word...i don't "hate" anyone. but i dislike bad drivers with a passion.
:)
wow! that is so fantastic!
good one. You are kick ass
That is awesome. I would have done the same too. Seriously teenagers need not to be on the road.
Wow.
Remind me to never drive anywhere near your town :P
GREATEST STORY EVER! You just made a very long week much much better!
Btw, I'm SO sorry for not getting back to you earlier. I would LOVE some apple butter since it sounds AMAZING. I'll send you my address.
Also, I never made it to the dang post office this week (I'm awful) but promise to get your gift in the mail this weekend.
I'm raising my beer to you right now lady. You ROCK!
OMG. YOU crack me up.
Moral of the story #1 : Never mess up with Mandy.
Moral of the story #2 : Being friends with Mandy is good, since she can beat some asses.
You are simply AMAZING.
From now on, I am no longer the queen of loudness.
You are sooooooooooooo smart!!!
alexa -- def. another perk of small town life.
kim - I agree she should have known better, have fun this weekend!
coconut --she was a little biotch
stacy -- thanks! I didnt really thing about it till afterwards.
jamie -- it was fun.
jefalk84 -- i hate stupid drivers too.
chickbug--it was, look on dear old dads face, priceless.
sissy--kicking ass and taking names
lbluca77--I agree, teenagers shouldnt be on the road.
frank -- you can drive in my town, please just dont almost hit my car and we'll be fine.
rebeccac -- glad I could make the week better.
andy--good morals of the story
beya -- not really, more like reckless
You are ballsy. I like ballsy.
I have the WORST road rage EVER. But this chick!? What a GOLDEN opportunity you had to get even! You go girl!!! I love it.
You my blogging friend are AWESOME! That seriously is the best story and something that I would have loved to have done!!!
BTW, the air fiddle? =) We all have things we do that we don't want other people to judge...I sure do!
Jill -- LOL. Thanks.
Randi --I have some bad road rage too.
Auburn Kat--I really do play a mean air fiddle. :-)
A-MAZING! I have lived in large-ish cities (1 million+ populations) after leaving my teeny-tiny-one-stop-light town in 2001. I STILL, to this day, expect to read about the local arrests and accidents in the next day's paper. Nothing is better than flipping over to page 4 and reading that the girl who made my life living hell in high school was arrested for her second DUI. :)
This story is hilarious! I can't quit laughing!
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